If I had access to a Blog on 9/11/2001
Running Diary for September 11, 2001
7:00am: I am awake, thanks to the alarm clock I have had since I was 8-years old. Today is my 25th birthday! I have survived on this planet for a quarter of a century. A couple of friends have told me that whatever happens on your 25th birthday becomes a metaphor for what the rest of your life will be like. If that is the case, hopefully something great will happen! Yay! Now to take a shower!
7:30: Turned MTV X on. I love that channel. It is all hard rock and heavy metal videos! Good going MTV! Now don't do something stupid like replacing it with an all hip-hop video station. Anyways, I see the video for System of A Down's "Chop Suey". Great song, but the chorus perplexes me: "Trust in my self-righteous suicide, why cry when angels deserve to die". I am not sure what to make of that statement. It makes me think of terrorists or something. Oh well, better be getting to class!
8:00: I arrive to my Counseling Techniques class. We are critiquing each other's "fake counseling session" videos today, and giving each other feedback. Since these are our first videos, there is obviously a lot of room for improvement. Dr. Mullis is very good at pointing out our strengths as counselors and giving constructive criticism.
8:48: Dr. McKee, one of my other grad school professors runs in and turns the television onto the news. Apparently something has happened at the World Trade Center in New York, some kind of explosion. There is smoke bellowing from the North Tower. I wonder what happened.
8:49: My question is answered. A plane has crashed into the North Tower. How the heck does that happen? Incompetent pilot?
8:51: Now THAT question is answered. Reports are that the plane was hijacked by terrorists. "Trust in my self-righteous suicide, why cry when angels deserve to die" makes a lot more sense now.
9:03: Another plane crashes into the South Tower of the WTC. This one is actually caught on live television. Everyone in my class gasps, a couple of people have tears in their eyes. I lean over to my friend and say, "And today is my 25th birthday." My friend announces this to the whole class, who respond by saying, "Oh my God, I am so sorry", or something to that effect.
9:14: CBS cuts to a shot of President Asterisk, I mean Bush, in a classroom reading a book to some elementary school-aged children. Bush just has this blank look on his face, as if to say to himself "You mean, I should have taken that intelligence I received about terrorists plotting against us more seriously?"
9:15-9:37: Stunned silence in the classroom. A few of my classmates are tearing up a bit. We are all concerned about the well-being of the people who are still in the Towers. Though none of us say it, we all know that there were probably no survivors on the planes that were used to crash into the buildings.
9:37: The news cuts to Washington, where another plane has crashed into the Pentagon. I make some off-handed comment to the effect of "And I am sure that is COMPLETELY unrelated to the first two". My classmates laugh, seemingly in need for a quick respite from the sadness of the morning's events.
9:59: The South Tower collapses, which seems architecturally impossible. The plane crashed into the top fourth of the building, so I don't see how the whole building would have collapsed. But whatever. I hope there weren't a lot of people left in that building.
10:03: Yet another plane has crashed, this time about 80 miles outside of Pittsburgh, seemingly in the middle of nowhere. That seems random. Maybe the passengers on that plane didn't want to put up with the terrorists' shit, and they missed their target. This is horrible. I am witnessing death on a grand scale and all I can think about is watching the Challenger explode. I thought that was my generation's tragedy, but I was sorely mistaken, unfortunately.
10:05: CBS News Reporter Andrea Mitchell is reporting that it is believed that a terrorist mastermind named Osama Bin Laden is responsible for today's attacks. They show the latest picture they have of him. Yeah, he is either a terrorist mastermind or a member of the Middle Eastern version of ZZ Top.
10:28: The North Tower collapses, again seemingly impossible, unless aided by strategically located explosives, but that is just my opinion. It is like a scene from a movie where a car falls off a bridge and completely explodes upon impact at the bottom of the ravine. Impossible!
10:50: Class is over, not that we did anything related to counseling techniques, other than trying to console each other. The bad thing is, I have two more classes.
11:00: I arrive in my Marriage and Family Counseling Class. Dr. McKee states that he plans on conducting class as normal. I have no idea what was talked about, because I kept picturing in my mind what I just witnessed, and I cannot get that damn song out of my head: "Why cry when angels deserve to die?" I am sure my classmates are suffering a similar plight, minus the song.
12:15: Mercifully, class is over. Today, Dr. McKee sounded like Charlie Brown's teacher: "wa wa wa wa wa". I walk to my apartment to make some lunch and to turn the news on. My next class is at 2pm (Group Counseling). That will give me a good hour or so to catch up on what is going on.
12:30: I arrive at my apartment to eat some lunch and to watch the news (I am sure this will be all that is on for the next week). That Bin Laden guy's name keeps coming up as the prime suspect. Orrin Hatch says "this act has Bin Laden's signature all over it." I get pissed because I am more concerned about how many people were killed or who survived in this tragedy. Figure out who did this later! Fucking politicians!
1:40: I have to walk back to campus for my Group Counseling class.
2:00: I arrive at my Group Counseling class. We are currently doing mock group counseling sessions with volunteers from the Intro to Psychology classes. Of course, all the kids want to talk about is what is happening. I don't know if my co-facilitator and I were much help because we are in just as much shock as they are. But it was a good session.
3:15: Thank God class is over! I go home and the first thing that happens is my mother calls me and nervously wishes me a Happy Birthday. I am pretty depressed right now. My birthday is going to go down as one of the most tragic days in American history. I am sure hundreds of people died, because the news is telling us that not everyone got out in time. I can see it now: Every time I tell someone when my birthday is, I can see them saying, "Woah, that sucks man!"
4:00: My girlfriend Brianne arrives to keep me company. We are going to Sal's Italian restaurant to "celebrate" my birthday, and the fact that I turned 25 on the worst day in recent history. I am starting to think that the friends who told me that "whatever happens on my 25th birthday will indicate how the rest of my life will go" are full of shit, and have no idea what they are talking about. Brianne and I watch the news for an hour or so. There is no escaping this, and all I want to do is watch the news. That's probably the attitude every American with half a heart has right now.
5:30: Dinner at Sal's. Brianne and I both order our favorite: Tagliatelle alla Mozzarella. The food is good, but I just am not enjoying it very much, at least not as much as I usually do. Part of that is because I thought I could escape from the news for a couple of hours. But that was before I realized Sal's has televisions all over the place, and they were all turned to, you guessed it, the news.
7:30: I return home. I realize that my friend Jeremy is getting married this coming Saturday, and I am his best man. Hmmm! What a bad omen! I will say it here and now! I do not like Beth (Jeremy's fiancé) at all! She does not treat him right, she is the most negative person in the world, and Jeremy can do a hell of a lot better than her! I heard in the news that all the airports are closed, and probably will be for some time! My dad is supposed to come to the wedding, since he will be in Washington on business. But I don't think he will be going anywhere anytime soon. I wonder how many guests Jeremy has that are from out of town.
7:35: I turn the TV to ESPN, because that should provide me an escape, right? What the fuck? Even ESPN is covering this tragedy! Chris Berman is heading up the reporting. What kind of nickname will he come up with for the prime suspect, Osama "Garbage" Bin Laden? All sports events have been put on hold. I suppose we all do need to focus on this tragedy for awhile, let it soak on our brains for a couple of weeks before attempting to go about our lives.
7:40: Watching the news, what I find more depressing than the tragedy itself is the video of the children of some of the missing men and women who worked in the Towers. They show one family where the mother and three daughters are holding up pictures of their husband/father asking him to call them. They are not ready to accept the reality that their loved one has probably died for no reason, except that a bunch of Muslim Radicals thought they would receive a bunch of virgins if they crashed those planes into the Towers. It is only human nature to hold on to hope until the very end. I guess if I was in their shoes, I would be doing the same thing.
9:00: Brianne has left to go back to her apartment. I decided I just wanted to stay by myself and watch the news some more before going to bed. At this point in time, the news just keeps repeating the same information over and over again, indicating they have nothing new to report. It is dark out, anyways, and I imagine looking for survivors will have to stop for the night. So why don't I turn the TV off and listen to music or something? I can't turn it off, and I don't know why. Is it because this is happening on my birthday, or because the World Trade Center has now replaced the Challenger as my generation's tragedy?
11:00: I find myself falling asleep in front of the television. Tomorrow has to be a better day, it just has to be! As I doze in and out of consciousness I keep thinking about that song: "Trust in my self-righteous suicide." That fucking song!
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